23 replies to this topic

[Matt B]

OK, so I had to write an ad that was only seven lines long . . . Can you believe that?!!

How can I communicate something in seven lines?
Especially after you take away the headline, contact info, call to action?

Luckily, I had some good help (they were also very free with their criticism), so I was able to barely make the deadline. But I just feel as though I couldn't communicate what I needed to in such a short format . . .

What can I do? demand more ad space? Drink more when I write?

Stumped -

[Jill]

Matt, the problem is that you were trying to do everything with your ad.

From what I understand about ad writing, especially newsletter ads or say Google AdWords, you aren't supposed to try to tell the whole story (like your first draft to me was). It's more like headline writing where you are just writing a teaser. The real info should be on your landing page.

The idea of the ad is to get people to click through to your site.

And even then, you really don't want just anyone to click through. Only those that really want what you're offering. Which is where your conversion tracking information comes in.

If you'll remember the articles I wrote a few weeks ago about ConversionRuler, I talked about how many clickthroughs and sales I was getting for my own newsletter ads. You can learn a lot of tricks by looking at that information.

But in your case, the bottom line is and was to simply make sure you write a good teaser. Quickly address the reader's need, and tell them how you can benefit them. Make them want to click through to learn more.

Then you can sell them on the product. Not in the ad.

Jill

[Matt B]

Ah - I see.

Adwords seems easy compared to this - because it was less limiting. This was just enough to get me started on a thought and run with it, instead of the quick bullet format.

I'll work on this for next week - I promise I'll have it to you well before the deadline this time <_<

AND, I'll read your Conversion ruler article . . . .

[Ron Carnell]

I think writing good ad copy is little different than writing a good article, short story or (ah hem) poem. Determine your audience. Determine your purpose. Write accordingly.

If the purpose of advertising was to sell a product or service, the ad space would come with a shopping cart.

[Jill]

Good point, Ron. And welcome to the forums, it's great to see you here! :bye:

Jill

[Matt B]

If the purpose of advertising was to sell a product or service, the ad space would come with a shopping cart.

Great idea!!!

Can I do that in the next ad, Jill?

[Scottie]

Welcome Ron! :bye:

Wonderful to have you here.

[copywriter]

Jill's right... short copy has special considerations. Here's an excerpt from my e-course with a bit of info you might find helpful:

==========

Short copy has some special considerations. The first (and most important) is that it isn’t meant to make the sale. Then why do you write it? To spark interest!

Short copy plays an important role in the advertising process. It can be used as a lead generation tool, an announcement, a teaser to build interest, and in lots of other ways. Extremely short copy is simply meant to lead to other means of closing a sale.

Postcard mailers might instruct the reader to send for an information package. Pay-per-click search engine listings will guide the reader to a Web site just full of copy. Ezine ads do the same thing. Small display ads in newspapers or in-store signage may encourage the reader to get more details. You get the point.

Many times, short copy will pull a better response if a limited-time offer is made. “Zero percent interest until Jan. 30th” or “Order before Feb. 1st and get FREE shipping.”

When you write extremely short copy, remember to stay focused. As I’ve said, there is not enough room to sell the customers within your copy, but there IS enough room to peak their interest. Use the limited space you have to punch up the biggest benefits or end results your customers are looking for, and you’ll see bigger returns on your investment.

==============

Hope it helps!

Karon

[Matt B]

WOW - yes, Karon, thanks.

I'm working on this short ad stuff, someday I might even get it.

I'm a little too wordy in every other area, to be short and concise is not my strong suit. . . .

[Toadally]

In my Google adwords campaign right now, I have: "Summer Sale! 15% off (keyword) gifts, jewelry.clothing and much more". I even have this campaign going when I am #1 in the SE for a keyword. Same in Overture although you can't have an exclamation ! in Overture. It will end in a couple of days but that is the only way I could see to entice people in for the sale. BTW only a little over a third of customers ever enter the code to redeem this coupon even though it is on the homepage and the checkout page. On the checkout page there is a prominent reminder to do so. I gave up trying to email them on previous Sales as it took WAY too much time refunding.
How is that for short copywriting Karon? It does seem to draw in extras but I am lousy at ROI.

[Ron Carnell]

Japanese poets,
in haiku and senryu,
perfect brevity.

haiku [hI'kOO] senryu [senrEOO'] : unrhymed Japanese poetry recording the essence of a moment keenly perceived, usually written in three lines of five, seven, and five syllables. (emphasis added).

From http://www.tnellen.c...iku/senryu.html : "Above all rely on your five senses to convey your ideas. Make the reader hear, see, smell, taste, touch your ideas; don't tell, show, demonstrate, illustrate, be sensory."

To write right, be sharp,
with no poke in naked eye,
so all get your point.

[Toadally]

Exactally. Brevity=virtue2

[Toadally]

uh, that did not work like I thought. Was supposed to be (2) in smaller font, ie: squared.

[Toadally]

Have you seen My Dear
How SEO changes now
We respond to it

[Toadally]

(I always thought haiku was 14 syllables but accomadated you or my misunderstanding.)